And God said, “This shit is cray.”

I know Tom Hardy gets all fidgety and embarrassed when people compare him to Marlon Brando.

Acting aside, I think he's failing to realize that THEY SHARE(D) STUPID FACES.


( let's use the latest Warrior premiere pics as exhibit A )



I AM JUST SAYING.

WHERE IS THE EXPLODING OVARIES GIF WHEN I NEED IT????? I feel like the biggest creeper when I say sometimes I just want to rub my face on his shoulders/arms and then stare at him all o___o.

/o\

HERE READ SOME AWESOME PORN:

Pavlov's Bell by whiskyrunner - catboy!Arthur and werewolf!Eames SET IN CANON, OKAY. I cannot articulate the levels of hotness this fic goes to, no lie. Arthur goes into heat and there is MATING.

Lap It Up by recrudescence - Okay, yes, another jailbait!Arthur fic, but I will pretty much read anything recrudescence writes because it is like eating my favorite ice cream over and over again. Plus, there is car!sex and lap dances and Cobb being kind of hilariously obtuse. WIN.

And in case you didn't know, ae_match starts today!!!!! There is already some great stuff posted, and you can rest assured there will be TONS MORE throughout the summer. &fandom;

SERIOUSLY.



Guys, I feel like having Tom Hardy in a movie about MMA fighting is SCARILY RELEVANT TO MY INTERESTS ON SO MANY LEVELS. You don't understand; my feelings toward MMA/the UFC are VERY much like the way I felt about THard in the early days of fandom: OH MY GOD, WHAT IS THIS, WHY AM I LOOKING AT THIS, YET I AM SO FASCINATED. Mr. Foxx sucked me into MMA a couple of years ago, and now I know the fighters' names and their weight classes and who's the top fighters and who's an up-and-coming and asf;dsfd NOW I WILL HAVE A MOVIE ABOUT MMA. WITH TOM HARDY. I am legit asking myself questions like "oh man, is he going to be light heavyweight? Will I get to see him make a Rear Naked Choke? WILL HE TKO SOMEONE WITH A KICK??" I am infinitely more excited about this movie than This Means War, not even gonna front. I JUST REALLY HOPE JOE ROGAN IS NOT IN THIS MOVIE. DDD: (Let me tell you about the time Mr. Foxx trolled Joe Rogan on Twitter...)



On a MUCH different note, Inception fandom, we need to have a talk about a very pressing issue, and that is:

THE LACK OF A PRIDE & PREJUDICE AU

What is this nonsense? How can you NOT see that Eames makes the most perfect Elizabeth Bennett EVER? Or that Arthur is basically made to be Mr. Darcy? COME ON, NOW, THIS IS JUST SAD. Eames' dear friend Ariadne is wanting to win the heart of the lovely Mr. Yusuf, who shows up to the party with this brooding Arthur, who is dark and gorgeous and horrid. He talks Yusuf into going back to the city and leaving Ariadne heartbroken, and Eames absolutely despises him. And then, later, Eames meets the dashing Mr. Fischer who totally sweeps him off his feet and tells Eames awful stories about how Arthur stole all his inheritance after his father passed. Etc. etc. MISUNDERSTANDINGS ABOUND AND THEN ARTHUR ASKS EAMES TO MARRY HIM AND EAMES IS LIKE, "......WHAT."

ARTHUR'S LIKE, "YEAH, I KNOW, I'M KIND OF APPALLED MYSELF, BUT I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU."

EAMES: *PUNCHES HIM*

I feel like I shouldn't mention it yet because it might jinx things, but...there's a very good possibility that I might be going to Maui in May. *___________________________* Some friends of ours are getting married there, and while we hadn't initially planned on going to the wedding, some other friends of ours, whom we're much closer to, have suddenly decided to go, which ups the fun meter on this trip by like ten billion. The couple getting married are kind of stupidly rich, and they're having their own booze shipped out to Hawaii (granted, the groom owns a bar, but still). They're staying at the second most expensive hotel on the island--which I'm pretty sure is where a fictional murder took place on Hawaii 5-0 recently, lolololol. Needless to say, we will NOT be staying at that hotel, but we are all about free booze. My friend, whose husband is an old frat brother of Mr. Foxx's and also the best man, has vowed to be "drunk, on the beach, and in a bikini" for the whole trip since she's not in the wedding. I AM ALL FOR THIS PLAN. Oh my god, I want to go SO BADLY. This trip will be epic, you guys, EPIIIIIIC. Perhaps I could be drunk, on the beach, and stalking Scott Caan? MAYBE??

I have got to get my ass in gear again and start working out more, ugh. Stupid cold weather, you are not conducive to running. DDD: HAWAII BIKINI, YOU WILL BE MINE. *shakes fist*

Fandom-wise, have some things:

- inception_art Fest!! This is looks like SO much fun, mostly because I am selfish and Inception fandom has some of the best artists around and I want ALL THE THINGS DRAWN EVER. Prompting starts tomorrow! Can't waiiiiiiit. \o/

- NEW THEME UP AT harlequincepted: FIRST TIMES. :DDDDD GO WRITE LOTS OF FIRST KISSES/TOUCHES/BLOWJOBS/TOPPINGS/WHATEVER, PLEASE.

- So there's this amazing WIP by skellerbvvt where Eames is sixteen and the perfect embodiment of every lost, angry, frustrated teenager, and Arthur's somehow becomes the one to save/fix him, even though he's 25 and struggling desperately not to give in to poor moral choices and just afk;dskfsgd IT IS SO AMAZING, OKAY, SO AMAZING. This is my favorite WIP right now, and I don't even like WIPs. Heart-wrenchingly good, omg.

- Speaking of bb!Eames (sort of), this...



...makes me want the sequel to my boarding school AU where Eames gets into theater at college and discovers he's actually REALLY TALENTED and starts getting lead roles in the school productions, and Arthur of course goes to all his shows and is all af;dskfsd; *___* in the audience because yes, Eames is talented, but he's also coming into his own and having confidence in himself and learning to be comfortable in his own skin and it's SO GODDAMN HOT ARTHUR CAN BARELY STAND IT. And then afterward they go back to Arthur's apartment and fuck up against the wall or something and Eames keeps gasping things like, "Knowing you're there, watching me, it gets me hard sometimes while I'm on stage," and Arthur can't last after that.

ANYWAY.

HEY THERE ARE GOLDEN GLOBES TONIGHT! I hear that JGL fellow is presenting. There might be a live blog in order...

You know those stories where Arthur gets the breath knocked out of him when Eames suddenly walks into the room wearing a stupidly gorgeous suit just to fuck with him?



Yeah.

Hoshit, I may have finished the de-aging fic, i.e. my first kink meme fill! IT IS OVER 10K, WTAF. And it'll probably top 11k, because halflinen has talked me into writing an epilogue. You guys, I am so not kidding when I say that this story is possibly THE most ridiculous, self-indulgent fic I have EVER written, and this is coming from the girl who wrote a million high school AUs and a story where My Chemical Romance are Labrador puppies. I don't even know what to say anymore about it, just. BB!Arthur, the things you make me write, adfld;gdfgk.

/pointless

Here, have some shots of THard being a stage actor like a BOSS:



SOMETIMES, I WISH I LIVED NEAR GOOD THEATER SHIT. ;___;

EDIT: OH MY GOD I CAN'T NOT POST THIS AFSKD;FSDKFS I LOVE THE WORLD.

I am currently writing about Ariadne taking sixteen-year-old!Arthur and Eames to The Gap.

WHAT IS MY LIFE OH MY GOD.

wordsalone just sent me this, so here's THard to keep this post from being completely pointless:



this is my bag x not a palm is really is a bag xx

Sometimes I think Inception fandom is like this star that is quickly on its way to going super nova and will EVENTUALLY IMPLODE ON ITSELF FROM THE VAST QUANTITIES OF AWESOMENESS. But seriously, how has this fandom only been in existence for not even three months and had this amount of epic output? It's insane. I have never had so much trouble writing simply because I am so distracted by reading everything in sight. Sadly, I do not have the willpower to avoid reading fic when I'm in the middle of writing.

You know what else? Joe-Lev continues to be an adorable little hipster, and yet sometimes I think him and this guy would be perfect for each other:



"Ridin my biKe thru my neighbourhood whilst wearing hats and packin heat yo xX"

TELL ME THEY ARE NOT MFEO.

BECAUSE EVERYONE NEEDS SOMETHING RIDICULOUS ON THEIR FLIST, HERE IS TOM HARDY AS A COWBOY:



YOU'RE WELCOME.

Now come tell me about Eames lost a bet with Arthur and now he's the one stuck roleplaying all of Arthur's super secret fantasies. NEXT UP, SLUTTY MAID.



Can I say that fandom is kind of working on a hivemind? I just started writing a fuck-buddies-who-are-actually-in-love story, and suddenly everyone is posting about either wanting said story or writing one of their own. HIVEMIND, I TELL YOU. Maybe it's a sign that I should really stop fucking off and start my big bang, um.