I'm sorry I missed the passing of your father. I am entering my 8th month of mourning mine and I wish I could promise it would get easier, but I can't see that from here yet, so it would be misleading of me to say to you what others have told me. (Unfortunately I do not have any work to throw myself into, like my siblings did, so I've had way too much time to lay around and feel sad.)
Others have already told you what you know to be true: your grief is your own and private and there is no wrong way (I mean, where can you even *find* a belltower these days? And the price of ammo...!)
I'm not quite sure if this other insensitive person is your husband or a friend or what, but I suggest you put them in their place by saying, "As much as I hate you at this very moment for hurting me like that, I still wouldn't wish this grief on you." I've found that to be a very effective stop.
Re: sherlock bb--I didn't even know this was around, as I've been off LJ for, well, 8 months, so I would be terribly upset if we were to miss your work because of someone else's carelessness.
High school. Eh. Look at it this way--pretty soon she'll graduate and either get a job or go to college. The four-week vacation will be a thing of the past.
Long distance hugs!