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Someone had to.
Um, so. I wrote faucet!porn in ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
arabella_hope's LJ, because, hi:
Josh in TV Guide: "I had some guys over from the cast the other night," he says, explaining both the alcohol stocked in the fridge and the broken faucet. A sly smile spreads over his lips. "I've gotta get that fixed before Yessi gets home."
And so we have this:
Title: Things Your Home Depot Warranty Does Not Cover
Pairing: Matt/Josh
Rating: light R
It always came down to who could remember what and when, and usually, everyone failed.
In the early afternoon light Josh leaned against the sink and stared blankly at the stainless steel Moen faucet Yessi'd picked out to match the fridge--"Steel gray, baby, it's all the rage and hella sexy," she'd said--which was now leaning at an unnatural angle.
Fuck. He juggled the nozzle and it almost came off in his hand.
There were fuzzy moments from the night before floating through his brain; Dom making "silver bullet shots" and then claiming it was Hawaiian tradiition to lose one's shirt after drinking; Foxy taking Dom up on said bet; Naveen doing Tequila shots on the deck and Dom somehow licking salt from his neck; Foxy, still naked from the waist up, leaning into Josh as they watched; Foxy saying Josh's skin always tasted like salt, he didn't need a shaker; Foxy backing him into the kitchen...
Oh. Right. He remembered now.
His own shirt had sort of fallen to the floor under Matt's hands and he was whispering things against Josh's neck, things Josh couldn't hear, but it didn't matter. He could smell the alcohol and nicotine and sweat in Matt's skin mixed with the faint remnants of whatever aftershave he was into at the moment.
He'd said, eyes closed, "You talkin' to me or just mutterin' to yourself?", and Matt's laugh had dissolved into the wet slide of their mouths as he'd pushed up against Josh, aligning their hips just so. Josh barely had time to gasp into his mouth before Matt was grabbing him by the waist and lifting up unto the edge of the sink.
"Nice hand-eye coordination," Josh had purred, but the words were instantly lost the second he realized Matt was tearing the front of Josh's jeans open, shoving them down his legs.
And then all Josh remembered was slick heat and suction and the way Matt dug his thumbs hard into the bare skin of his thighs. He tried to thrust up, but ended up sliding off the edge of the counter and into the sink, his back slamming into the faucet as his head hit the window.
"Fuck, shit, Christ, man!" he'd yelled even as he was panting and clawing at Matt's shoulders.
"Want me to stop?" Matt didn't even look up, just breathed the words against Josh's cock as it rested along his bottom lip.
"You fuckin' stop and I'll kill you myself."
There was a laugh, and then seconds later Josh was coming out of his skin, watching as Matt sucked him up, took him in, and then licked his lips slowly when it was over. He curled his hand around Josh's neck and kissed him so deeply Josh could taste himself through every inch of Matt's mouth.
"Think you broke something," he whispered after they broke apart, and only then did Josh fully acknowledge that he was sprawled naked in his kitchen sink.
"Long as it ain't any bones, I think I'm good." He'd managed to hoist himself up with Matt's help, and then he was attacking Matt's fly, shoving him back into the fridge. "My turn, Fox."
"Absolutely," he'd gasped.
He still remembered the way Matt slumped against the fridge after coming in his mouth, his sloppy smile and the way he'd swiped his fingers through Josh's hair. Everything after that was a blur.
And now, in the light of day with a goddamn hangover pounding in his skull, he had a fucking broken faucet.
He couldn't think which was worse: the fact that Yessi would be home in three days, or that he would think of sex every time he did the dishes.
arabella_hope's LJ, because, hi:Josh in TV Guide: "I had some guys over from the cast the other night," he says, explaining both the alcohol stocked in the fridge and the broken faucet. A sly smile spreads over his lips. "I've gotta get that fixed before Yessi gets home."
And so we have this:
Title: Things Your Home Depot Warranty Does Not Cover
Pairing: Matt/Josh
Rating: light R
It always came down to who could remember what and when, and usually, everyone failed.
In the early afternoon light Josh leaned against the sink and stared blankly at the stainless steel Moen faucet Yessi'd picked out to match the fridge--"Steel gray, baby, it's all the rage and hella sexy," she'd said--which was now leaning at an unnatural angle.
Fuck. He juggled the nozzle and it almost came off in his hand.
There were fuzzy moments from the night before floating through his brain; Dom making "silver bullet shots" and then claiming it was Hawaiian tradiition to lose one's shirt after drinking; Foxy taking Dom up on said bet; Naveen doing Tequila shots on the deck and Dom somehow licking salt from his neck; Foxy, still naked from the waist up, leaning into Josh as they watched; Foxy saying Josh's skin always tasted like salt, he didn't need a shaker; Foxy backing him into the kitchen...
Oh. Right. He remembered now.
His own shirt had sort of fallen to the floor under Matt's hands and he was whispering things against Josh's neck, things Josh couldn't hear, but it didn't matter. He could smell the alcohol and nicotine and sweat in Matt's skin mixed with the faint remnants of whatever aftershave he was into at the moment.
He'd said, eyes closed, "You talkin' to me or just mutterin' to yourself?", and Matt's laugh had dissolved into the wet slide of their mouths as he'd pushed up against Josh, aligning their hips just so. Josh barely had time to gasp into his mouth before Matt was grabbing him by the waist and lifting up unto the edge of the sink.
"Nice hand-eye coordination," Josh had purred, but the words were instantly lost the second he realized Matt was tearing the front of Josh's jeans open, shoving them down his legs.
And then all Josh remembered was slick heat and suction and the way Matt dug his thumbs hard into the bare skin of his thighs. He tried to thrust up, but ended up sliding off the edge of the counter and into the sink, his back slamming into the faucet as his head hit the window.
"Fuck, shit, Christ, man!" he'd yelled even as he was panting and clawing at Matt's shoulders.
"Want me to stop?" Matt didn't even look up, just breathed the words against Josh's cock as it rested along his bottom lip.
"You fuckin' stop and I'll kill you myself."
There was a laugh, and then seconds later Josh was coming out of his skin, watching as Matt sucked him up, took him in, and then licked his lips slowly when it was over. He curled his hand around Josh's neck and kissed him so deeply Josh could taste himself through every inch of Matt's mouth.
"Think you broke something," he whispered after they broke apart, and only then did Josh fully acknowledge that he was sprawled naked in his kitchen sink.
"Long as it ain't any bones, I think I'm good." He'd managed to hoist himself up with Matt's help, and then he was attacking Matt's fly, shoving him back into the fridge. "My turn, Fox."
"Absolutely," he'd gasped.
He still remembered the way Matt slumped against the fridge after coming in his mouth, his sloppy smile and the way he'd swiped his fingers through Josh's hair. Everything after that was a blur.
And now, in the light of day with a goddamn hangover pounding in his skull, he had a fucking broken faucet.
He couldn't think which was worse: the fact that Yessi would be home in three days, or that he would think of sex every time he did the dishes.
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OMG, this SO needed to be written. And I'm so glad you were the one to do it. This is awesome!! GUH. Wow, there's been on Foxshy for ages. THANK YOU, Josh for all you do. And,
*loves and molests*
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And that's why we love them so. ;)
Also? GUH! I got a bit distracted by the thought of Dom licking salt from Naveen's neck, kind of stuck with that paragraph for a while, heee! Yay for Foxshy and YAY for you writing it.
*loves madly*
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HEEEE, I know you FAR TOO WELL. :D
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;p
♥
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That's one way to get a guy to do the dishes ;)
This was rather yummy... and I don't even like RPF! :D
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the alcohol and nicotine and sweat in Matt's skin mixed with the faint remnants of whatever aftershave he was into at the moment.
I adore that detail, BTW.
BIG kisses again!
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*gropes*
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So damn hot and funny. And I love the title!
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Drunk and horny Foxshy is so damn hot...
*is mush*
or that he would think of sex every time he did the dishes.
Heehee,this is pretty much the best thing ever!!!;P
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You've seen Josh pics,right?I'm half-ded because of'em.
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Great stuff, I've added this one into my favorites folder!
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God, ain't that the truth!
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Poor Josh. I wonder if he's got a faucet-shaped bruise somewhere. I know I would :D
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♥
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"You talkin' to me or just mutterin' to yourself?" Love that line, the little details in here were really great.
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