Brilliant. I absolutely love your Keller voice -- it's pitch-perfect and completely realistic.
Strange that my favorite moment can be considered the most depressing: “Sure,” I laughed, “and if you’re giving me head like that when I’m eighty, you’ll need to go in a fucking hall of fame or something.” It came out feeling right, but I saw that pinch above his nose.
The "pinch above his nose" bit kills me. It's like you can hear what Toby is thinking at that very second, that the sound of "Chris Keller, sentence: 88 years" is going through his head over and over.
*GUH*
Strange that my favorite moment can be considered the most depressing:
“Sure,” I laughed, “and if you’re giving me head like that when I’m eighty, you’ll need to go in a fucking hall of fame or something.” It came out feeling right, but I saw that pinch above his nose.
The "pinch above his nose" bit kills me. It's like you can hear what Toby is thinking at that very second, that the sound of "Chris Keller, sentence: 88 years" is going through his head over and over.
You need to write more, girl.